Self-Acceptance: A Must for Restoring Intimacy


Self-Acceptance: A Must for Restoring Intimacy

Edited by B. Brewer, UOAA UPDATE 11/12

Frequently, among the first things to enter a recovering patient’s mind after major surgery is: “Will I be a whole person in the eyes of my spouse/partner?

Accepting one‘s self is the first step toward a happier marriage and sex life (at any time, for that matter!). By accepting one’s self, one appears as an emotionally well-balanced and relaxed person appealing to his or her spouse/partner. When one has fear of rejection, fear of being unable to perform, fear of being loved, these fears can be self-fulfilling.

A healthy, mutual, emotional caring for and about each other’s well-being, always plays the most important role in a loving relationship. Another most important ingredient is openness,

a comfortable attitude that accompanies self-acceptance and invites acceptance by the spouse.

If you are concerned about how your spouse will react to the change in your body that is normal. The hardest part is accepting what you cannot change, but you must for a healthy outlook. Once you manage to banish fear of rejection and the anger of “Why me”? You can work toward rebuilding emotional health and toward becoming comfortable with your new image.

Your spouse may have greater emotional hang-ups than you, concerns that may be magnified by concerns for your emotional health. Your own positive attitude goes far in rebuilding the relationship, rekindling the “old spark”.

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